Thursday, July 9, 2009

Scribbling after the 6th of July

What a relief... The IB results have arrieved, and it brought along a cocktail of bad and good news to the students of KMB. Some were completely gratified and thrilled to get the results that they hope for, and it had the sense that their two years of pain-stacking, gruelling IB has bear its fruits. But there were also those who are unfortunate, but i believe that they have worked as hard, if not, harder, than those who were successfull. it's just luck wasn't there to give that laverage. I believe that their future will be more vibrant than most of us, and i wish and pray them the best. Don't give up.
My results came unexpectedly. In the weeks leading to the 6th of July, i had totally deregistered the IB exams from my memory. I was so entanggled by my new hobby; travelling and music, that i have totally forgotten that the annoucement of the results has came to a near.
I didn't expected much. My forecast were ambition-lacked; a 6 in Maths maybe. 2 marks bonus marks... oklah. I also felt that econs would be around a 6. When that day arrived, i felt a sudden gush of anxiety travelling from the feet upwards, and it hovered around the chest, activating the sweat and adrenaline glands, which in turn caused me to severely perspire. I knew, in my mind, that the results are already out at school, but i wasn't sure whether to end the wait immediately by asking the teachers, or should i wait until 9.15 pm, when the IBO will upload our results on the net. It could not be contained, so i messaged someone, asking if the results are out. It has. OMFG! Then i got a phone call. I know it was about my result. i picked it up, and the person from the end of the line further exacerbated my anxiety attack, asking me whether if i would like to know my IB points? Yes, obviously.
I would never forget that moment when she uttered the digits of my pointer. My reaction depicted the time when Federer clinched his 15th Wimbledon title against Andy Roddick, and i kneeled and prostrated the presence of Allah as a sign of deep gratitude to Him for giving me the results that I didn't expected much. I just could not contain the tears that came trailing down my eyes; a great relief after what i have endured in KMB. It was sheer joy, and it lasted just for 17 minutes.
Reality came slapping on my face, and made me realize that what i got wasn't the destination, but a mere pitstop of my rally to the greater cause and objective that i have decided to bind myself to. After a day, it felt good, but noticably it was diminishing, and by the 2nd day, it felt nothing. And i just hope, in the long run, it won't turn into a curse, as what happened to me before.
Nevertheless, i felt grateful for the outcome i received. I dedicate this to my parents and family for their endless support, love and care. And if not for my dedicated teachers who put so much energy, time and faith in me, i would never come close to what i have now. And of course, my friends and my batch, who stood together through thick and thin, teaching me the ups and downs of life. Regardless of who you are, who came to know me, in some ways, you have lead me to my present and future, and prevent me from resenting myself on the past. I was a nobody, and all of you make me a somebody. I am trully in debt.
Now i could breath for a while, before i continue writing my next chapter my life.


sarah said...

love u bby

zulaikhazainol said...

hats off to u aizat! (^o^)

Anonymous said...


Moon~~ said...

halo fren :)