Monday, March 10, 2008

Finding a reason and a purporse


It was a reality which came like a gush of wind. I was attending my weekly usrah and we discussed, in a very open manner, of the reality of the world we are living in. And the thing is, reality is not as pleasent as it seems. My naqib started off by asking what will become of us all in the next 1o years. Each and everyone of us in the usrah had some say, and for me, i see myself as a surguen cum doctor at that time. than he brought up the issue, to me , of great importance; is it worth enduring 8 to 9 years of vigorous medical school, just to end up as a robot? It does sound a little bit over the top and rude, but thinking back, it is true. Im my case, IB is already hard enough, and there will be another 6 to 7 years of medical school, and in the process, ill be sacrificing so many things. But it just sickens me that the end product will be dr who wake up at 6, go to work until 5pm, come back, have dinner, and continue working at night, and the on-calls, and the vicious cycle will continue until i retire. By that time, ill be too old to do the things which i didn't have the chance to do in my working days. Is it worth the sweat and blood for the whole 8 to 10 years, just to become a robot? Is life worth just spending in the office and meeting sick people on a regular basis? To me, i feel sick to the gut just cosidering the prospect which is in store for me in the future. And this also implies on careers other that medicine. Life should be more than the 8 to 5 pm dull routine. My naqib ask us all to think of what should we do. To me, this is not the life i wanted and i was not born on this earth just to become a bloody slave. I am here to make a difference. Some might be sceptical of what my plans are, thinking that they are too ambitious that they are out of my reach, but i believe that i have the capabilities and the strenght to achieve what man thought impossible. I wanted to make a difference in this world, may it be big or small. I would really love to travel all around the world, celebrate the the different cultures, and to help those people in need. it might sound big, but i have already taken the first step out of the many that i need to take to get there. Should be there any difference between me and the people in africa? I am obliged to join the many young men and women who have the spirit and desire to make a change in this world. Hassan Al-Bana once wished that he hoped to die as a martyr, and as for me i pray that i'll die in my battle for truth and just, and in my last gush of breaths, i hope to see the world a much more better place. Inshallah.


Eye opener


Just wanna share you a video which really opened my eyes to the reality of life. Its a must watched. Enjoy.


Ma makna Islam?

Firstly, I am writing this not as a pious man nor an ustaz, not as a sheikh nor as a tabligh. But i am writing this as a muslim, a proud muslim who is obliged to do the amar makruf wa nahi mungkar and to counter the misconceptions about the ad-deen, not just among the non muslims, but also among my brothers and sisters of islam. But please, don't have the idea of me wearing the white headgear and the jubah, and having a long beard. I hardly wear any kopiah before, for your information.
I have a question to ask; what is islam?
I did ask this question to a few of my friends and some people that i encountered, and their answers are quite dissapointing. Some restrict the practice of islam just in the confinements of the 5 pillars of islam. Instead, in reality, islam is much more than that. It is not just a religion, but it is ad-deen; a way of life. Western orientalist and secularism has somehow corrupted the minds and thoughts of muslims with te doctrine that islam is only in the mosque, and once you are out of the mosque, you are someone else. No, islam is much more than that. It is a system of life, where it teaches its followers the basis of every aspect of life, ranging from the smallest of things in our daily life, such as the taharah (cleanliness) until the ethics and guidelines on how to govern a country or an empire (the daulah). It is a complete, thorough manual of life, with the al-quran and the as-sunnah as the reference and the prophet Muhammad (pbuh) as the main example. Islam is everywhere; from the way you smile, the way you care about people, the way you talk, the way you sit, the way your eat, and the list goes down. If you are aware, we are constantly reminded of what islam really is in the solah that we perform : 'kul inna solati wa nusuki, wa mahyaya wa mamati lillahi rabbil alamin'. meaning ; my prayers, my ibadah, my life and my death is dedicated to Allah, the creator of all. (quoted in the iftitah).
In my personal opinion, the source of the misconception could be traced to how we are educated by our parents, teachers and the society. We have been brought up with the idea that islam equals malays, and we are continuously taught into picturing a muslim wearing a songkok, a baju melayu or a jubah, the serban, and that person sitting in the surau. It is deeply embedded in the society that we somehow mistook culture with Islam. And to some extent, islam is wrongly claimed that it inhibits development, and it is a much dissapointment that some of my brothers and sisters supported this statement.
History has proven that Islam ia not just able to exist coincide with development, but instead, the development of knowledge flourished under the reign of Islam. From the times of the Khulafa' Ar-rashidin, to the Umayyads, the Abbasids, until the Ottomans, the world has witnessed an unprecedented rise of the Islamic civilisation, with the territory controlled by muslims grew rapidly and muslim scholars speerheading new discoveries and findings in every field of knowledge. And bear in mind that all of the great Muslim thinkers are also prominent religious leaders.
Brothers and sisters, the time for change is now. It is essential that all of us embrace the true meaning of islam and cast aside the misleading ideas that has so long been ascociated with it. We need to always remind ourselves and others what islam is really all about.
And lastly, i would like to ask a question for all of us to ponder; from puberty until now, what have we contributed to Islam?

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Ferenheit rising....

Well, im really sorry for being idle for the last 2 to 3 months. i have been very busy as hell and to tell you the truth, i have never imagined mysely where i seriusly, damn seriusly, have no time for myself. Before entering College Mara Banting, our seniors constantly telling us not to take up IB we reasons like bz and stres and etc. etc. We never took them serius, with the thought that they were joking with us. But after doing IB for the past 9 months, it hit me like a speeding train. First sem was ok, assignment were moderate, not much projects, and everythng was ok, thought we were already feeling the heat. And then come second semester, and all hell break loose. It's just unfair to make a generalisation on all IB world schools, but KMB's IB programme will suck the life and sunshine out of u, and this is not a hyperbolic statement. With the CAS class-based project, the exhibitions, the assignments, the lab report, the gropu 4 project, the EE, the CAS project, the CAS report, and much much much more, its no question mark that the students are constantly under pressure. There was this one week, my class just came back from a camp (which we organized and we, ourselve participated). We were deprived of sleep, fatigued, and worn out. Then came our Malay Lit exhibition, and there went our sleep. At the same time, we have lab reports which were due on that very week. And at the same time, we had maths and bio exam on the same week. Lack of sleep, the pressure was taking a toll on each and every one of us. On one night, i was shocked to see my friend, in the middle of the night, was doing his report, and he was crying. His eyes were red of the little sleep he had for 3 days in the row. For me, being the president of the student council adds up a whole new bunch of problems. But i managed to keep my emo intact though at certain times, when i am alone, looking at the picture in front of me on the table, i just cant hold back. One part of me was very grateful that the person in the picture does not have to go through the mental torture i am experiencing, and at the same time, another part of me just wished that i am not here, not on this pathway, not in this field, and i might, just might be, as in the picture with that person. The hopes, the expectations were too overwhelming that u feel as u want to let go of everything and be just... no one. The UK dream, the plans, felt so out of reach.In the surau, i develope the habit of watcing a group of children , who are regulars at the surau, playing around, and i would always wish that i could turn back time to the days when i was like those children; no worries and no responsibilities. It took me a while to overcome the pervasive feeling that was overpowering me, and the only thing that give me that little but too important strength was i have something to prove to someone, and i want to make that person proud of me. At the same time, i felt that i had a bigger purpose in life; to help those people in need, and my responsibility to revive back the ummah. These reasons make the sleepless nights, the fatigues, and the tears a little bit worthwile. Ms Loh once said, the pressure can either break u or make u, and if u manage to 'survive' the 2 year programme, u are destined to be someone great. i hold on to that very dearly. And of course, there were conflicts which needed to be cofronted and taken control of. I lost more friends than i make one, and as i write this entry, i might lose my very source of strength. I don't know. if that happens.... Its not too much if i say that IB is just about being the best, but its all anout surviving the 2 excruciating years. Maybe the dream i once told hanif is materializing in front of me as i speak.